We all need to be validated and accepted. We all want to be appreciated for who we are and what we do. Validation and acceptance can be displayed in many ways- someone genuinely showing you affections of love; receiving gifts from friends; your employer acknowledging your hard work and efforts; a coworker accepting your help and genuinely thankful for the progress you put towards the work. Acceptance and validation is necessary in life because it helps us to understand our unique position in this world and allows us to continue to develop our best and higher selves.
But what happens when you do not validate, accept, and appreciate yourself? You begin, consciously and subconsciously to solely look for these affections elsewhere. Through people, places, things, events, awards, achievements, accolades, degrees, assets, and the such.
It is OK to unconsciously practice this self-defeating behavior when you are not fully aware of who you are, what your purpose is in life, and if you have not yet begun to live as your true and authentic self- the individual you were created to be. It is OK when you just don’t know. But when you begin a journey of spiritual transformation and enlightenment to become your higher self, these old ideas, thoughts, patterns, and ways of doing things will no longer serve you, but only hinder you. In fact, as you begin true growth and development on your spiritual journey, you will come to realize that these old ideas and patterns stifle you and keep you limited. You will began to want to love you, appreciate you, and want to heal all past wounds. You will learn that after the love of God, your own love for yourself is truly what matters.
Everyone won’t love you.
As previously stated, we all do indeed want and need love from others, but it may not always come or it may come on low levels. Some may even have been validated positively all their lives or throughout their lives and relied on this positive validation to “be,” still without believing the positive affirmations for themselves. Still, some may validate you for their own personal motives and agenda (flattery, smooching, buttering, negative agendas). But you are not defined by what others think of you. You are defined by who God says you are and who you know you are deep inside. That’s why it’s important to read, meditate, and memorize the scriptures daily to solidify your identity through Christ. Know who you are and stand for the truth of your true self. If you are defined by others negatively, reject and refuse that identity.
Renew your mind daily and stand out as the individual you were destined to be. You are required to do so to glorify God and for your own self-preservation.
Romans 12:2- “And be not conformed to this world:but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.”
1 Corinthians 2:16- “For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ.”
Philippians 2:5- “Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus.”
Ephesians 4:23- “And be renewed in the spirit of your mind.”
2 Corinthians 4:16- “For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man (mind and spirit) is renewed day by day.”
Philippians 4:8- “Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”
Renewing and transforming your mind so that it lines with the truth and who you are is another secret to unlocking and living the life you were meant to live.
LOVE VALIDATE APPRECIATE ACCEPT YOURSELF
“For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother’s womb; I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well; my substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth; thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book allmy members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them” (Psalm 139:13-16).
DO YOU BELIEVE THIS SCRIPTURE OR DO YOU CASUALLY READ IT WITHOUT DIGESTING AND APPLYING IT TO YOU????
Being fearfully and wonderfully made means that God made you intricately and marvelously; like an architect building an exotic home; like an engineer who specializes in building unique, distinct, and complicated projects. So He fashioned us individually, with a purpose, and to HIS own liking.
When you learn to understand who God is, you learn to understand and love yourself and you fall in love with your own rarity. Regardless of circumstances, failures, limitations, negative thoughts from others or yourself, and disappointments, if He woke you up, you are breathing, and you belong to Him, He has created you to show His creation.
Just because you may not believe a truth does not mean the truth is not the truth. Just because you may reject these verses does not mean they are not true. So whether you choose to believe and live the truth, God will continue to be faithful and continue to move forward, as He is a progressive power. His Word is true and He even magnifies His Word above His name (Psalm 138:2).
So get on board with the truth, knowing it and living it. God has a plan for His rare creatures and has planned great and favorable things for us. It is our duty to seek Him with our heart; seek the kingdom; seek His will over our own; believe His Word and live as a wonder; a testimony; a rare beauty.
WHOSE REPORT DO YOU BELIEVE??? WE WILL BELIEVE THE REPORT OF GOD!!!!
What does listening to and obeying the Most High mean? How exactly do we exercise this? Well, first, the Most High God is a spirit so this can get complicated if one is ignorant of His ways. So the Most High is a spirit and sent His only begotten son, Christ, in the form of flesh-man, and also was gracious to send and impart unto us the Holy Spirit- the spirit of wisdom. This means that listening to the Most High and receiving His Word, plan, and vision may be done so in various ways.
He can speak to us through another person- directly or indirectly. He can speak to us through dreams and revelations. He can also communicate to us through our own spirit. Thoughts, signs we get throughout the day; reading; television; radio; angels. He can use anything and anyone to communicate to us. He communicates both good and bad things to us.
The thing is that if we are not tuned into the Holy Spirit and act upon what we “hear” or what is revealed to us, the signs, communication, and revelations He has for us will be overlooked and missed. If we are not aware or do not become aware of the signs and wonders the Most High does on a daily basis to communicate with us, we will do ourselves a disservice of the blessings He pours upon us. We will only be living a limited life. We will be shutting ourselves from one of the many gifts He has bestowed upon us.
I was led to write this particular blog, like all previous ones, out of sheer inspiration. I was recently pondering how much the Most High reveals and talks to me about my personal life through many different avenues, on a daily basis and how he has been doing this all my life, but I was unconsciously tuned out many times, sometimes only getting bits of His revealings.
Be aware of the still small voice. Be aware and conscious of the ways of the Most High. He communicates to us in various ways, some simple and some peculiar. We just have to have an ear to hear and actively listen to that voice.
Giving is truly a gift. It feels great to give cheerfully and to give without expecting anything in return is wisdom. When you give without expecting anything in return, you are setting yourself up to receive blessings that are unexpected.
The problems arise when you give grudgingly or if you are not focused on the cause of giving but rather focused on getting something in return. Of course it is awesome to receive gifts from others, but some may mistake giving for bartering when they are expecting something just because they gave.
Before you give, decide what your motives are. Give lovingly and cheerfully. Don’t give to be seen by man. Don’t give what you are not able to. If you have regrets after you have given, reflect upon what you gave and check your true motives. Don’t feel bad when you can’t give or when you are not in the mood to give. We are humans, not robots being controlled on when to give. Listen to Holy Spirit and give when you are led to give.
2 Corinthians 9:7- “Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, [so let him give]; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver.”
Matthew 6:1-34- “Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven.”
Proverbs 11:24-25- “There is that scattereth (gives), and yet increaseth; and [there is] that withholdeth more than is meet, but [it tendeth] to poverty; the liberal soul (giving soul) shall be made fat: and he that watereth shall be watered also himself.”
We should know that God will bless us or will allow others to do so in His own time.
“Ugghh, I need to manage my time better!!!” Been thinking this for YEARS and still can’t grasp how to really go about the doing. That’s because we can’t manage time. Nope. We can’t simply “find” time, grab it, and control the constancy of it. Remember, we are spirit beings, but we are still attached to flesh and bones. No one can really define or truly measure it; it cannot be seen. We just know morning, noon, and evening occurs. We know days pass and we get older. Attempting to measure time is trying to be in control of time, which cannot be done.
Instead, we can make best use of the time we do have here on earth. The “time” that we have come to know, because God knows, understands, and controls time- the “time” we can’t see. But with our man-made clocks, watches, and stop watches, we can do the best we can with our definition of “time.” We can change our focus of managing time to instead choosing to procrastinate less, practice becoming more productive within time periods (30 mins, hourly), and become more organized in our personal and professional lives so we are not wasting and losing time. Of course making “to-do” lists and having a flexible schedule both help as well.
“But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day” (2 Peter 3:8).
“For a thousand years in thy sight are but as yesterday when it is past, and as a watch in the night” (Psalm 90:4).
I find that if you are not setting aside time for God; reading and meditating on the Word; praying; researching truth; feeding your spirit, time definitely seems to slip away and you get that tug on your heart that time and YOU are wasting away because you are not devoting yourself to the things of God. It seems like we “make time” for everything else, but spiritual and godly things….
In Colossians 4:5, we are instructed to “walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time.” Then Ephesians 5:15-16 says, “see then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise; redeeming the time, because the days are evil.” Both scriptures inform us to “redeem time;” live holy and meekly with the time we have left because much time has already past; we have already wasted too much time in life.
“Lord, make me to know mine end, and the measure of my days, (the time I have) what it is: that I may know how frail I am; behold, thou hast made my days as an handbreadth; and mine age is as nothing before thee: verily every man at his best state is altogether vanity. Selah” (Psalm 39:4-5).
The time referred to in these verses speak of time within the lifespan of a person, but there is another time God deals with.
Eccleciastes 3:8 says, “a time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.”
Romans 13:11; “and that, knowing the time, that now it is high time to awake out of sleep: for now is our salvation nearer than when we believed.”
Genesis 8:22; “while the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.”
These are the times of seasons. This may be in terms of months or specific time periods (weekly, monthly, an entire year).
There seems to be 3 categories of time:
-seasons (calendar, time periods)
-time measured by man with the limited knowledge we have (clocks, watches, etc.)
So see, we can’t really make one definition of time. Neither can we “manage time” or control it. We truly can’t even say that we are in the correct time period because calendars and time zones are different and we are only going off of time that we have been forced to know. We just know that whatever “time” we do have, we best make the most use of it. Only God can define, manage, and control time.
I have come to the conclusion that most of the time, we don’t know what we want. Of course, there are some things we may be sure of; like certain dreams and desires we know that we want to be brought into manifestation; we are certain we want a specific career path and we are more certain of what we prefer in a mate. But I have personally found time and time again that we really don’t know what we want and that our spirits truly yearns what God wants for us.
For example, as stated before, someone may strongly desire a certain career path for their lives. Maybe they want to go into the oil field or engineering. As they are pursuing this desire which may be truly of a sincere, humble desire, they may find that they either began to lose interest in the particular path or the specific doors they want opened to fully pursue their desire are most of the time closed. They may ponder their choices and their desires and ask themselves if this pursuit is truly what they want. The desire was a pure and positive desire, but maybe it was not the will of God and as we know, God has His plans for us, and then, we have our own plans for ourselves. So we may find that God begins to put His desires in our hearts so ultimately, His desire becomes our desire. “Trust in the Lord, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed; delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart; commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass” (Psalm 37: 3-5).So we find that the desire we had before begins to be replaced with God’s will and what He desires for us. And then in a quite amazing way, we find ourselves on a totally different path and purpose than we thought. We will certainly see many of our dreams and desires come to pass in our lives, but overall, we see God’s will manifesting throughout all areas of our lives without us really knowing the specific details of how our lives have transformed. We also witness and feel our lives having more joy and cheerfulness in our new path, opposed to what we had so merely planned for ourselves.Though you have free-will, God still gets the final say so in our lives- even that of those who do not believe or live for God.“O house of Israel, cannot I do with you as this potter? saith the Lord. Behold, as the clay is in the potter’s hand, so are ye in mine hand, O house of Israel” (Jeremiah 18:6). So, if you are His child, no matter how stubborn you are with conforming to His plan, He will in His time and His own way discipline you and guide you on the path He has for you. Some may need a slight nudge, some may be disciplined roughly so that they are aware of being on the wrong path, and some are just going to be guided to the point when they look back at their circumstances they will know without doubt it was the hand of God that led them on the right path without them knowing what was taking place at the time. Some spend years building upon something and when they have finally accomplished the thing, they still find themselves unsatisfied, unfulfilled, or they may even feel guilty of spending years on something that they find they really do not want. This can be with either right or wrong desires- even some good desires we have for ourselves will not necessarily be what God has for us. Good vs. Best.“Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain” (Psalm 127:1).
“A man’s heart deviseth his way: but the Lord directeth his steps” (Proverbs 16:9).
Let’s remember that God ALWAYS knows what’s best for us. Even when it doesn’t seem like it and most especially when WE don’t know what’s best for ourselves (or we think we know). His ways are not ours, nor His thoughts and plans ours. He is the Alpha and Omega; the Greatest, so He knows the way our lives should be and He knows it will eventually be for our favor and liking.
GOD TRULY KNOWS WHAT’S BEST FOR US
Life is a mystery. Only to the Most High can “life” truly flash by or happen quicker than the speed of lightning. To us mortals, life is a process that happens overtime and if one is informed at an early age in life about this phenomenon, one will be more equipped to understand that they must view their lives as a gift that should be delicately unwrapped; taken with stride; observed, pondered, and studied during its process. They will understand that their life is their book and they should not seek to rush it, but learn and grow as much as they can, while they can. If we all knew this truth early on, we would have been able to live purposefully for a cause; striving to maximize all opportunities and aspects of our lives. But it’s OK; God still reserves much favor and grace in our humility and acknowledgment of our not knowing.
My thoughts on this subject stems from 2 Timothy 2:15, “Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” This verse means that apart from us learning from our pastors and elders, we must do our own study and research the Word for ourselves, knowing it is ultimately to please God. We must not solely rely on our teachers to feed us, but we must feed ourselves and continue to seek the truths within the Bible.
One day I pondered how this verse may be applied to not only just reading the Word, but to life in general. So knowledge and wisdom you have learned from others must be applied to your life; studied and pondered. A wise person may offer you some wisdom or ponderings, but you have to be the one to decide whether you will just listen to what they are saying, or will you go the extra mile to see how that wisdom they spoke applies to you or those around you. You can show yourself approved:
-In your marriage/relationships- learning what a true relationship is; doing research; pondering and studying other relationships to enable your own to grow
-In parenting- learning wrong and right parenting styles
-In your favorite hobby/interest- becoming the best you can be with your interests (but not making your hobbies and interests idols :] )
And in other areas of your life you can demonstrate the value of study, ponder, and evaluation.
Will you dig deeper in order to become wiser yourself in order to be approved by God? Will you study, ponder, observe, and engage your spirit and mind into higher knowledge of the Most High God; the complexities of life; your own interests and likes?
Observe, study, and ponder life- it will transform you.